Our ego is the main reason why we aren’t really happy. It is the root of all problems, all wars, all jealousy and all envy, all fear and depression. Therefore it’s worth it to look a little closer at it.
A lot of people have a wrong impression of it, because they confuse the ego with our real core.The ego is an artificial construct and has nothing to do with our real selves. We enter the world as a clean slate, we have an authentic self. More and more the slate becomes full of wriitng, from parents, from school, from friends, from partners, the society, religion, media, etc. etc.
The result is a set of operating instructions for functioning which becomes fatter every year. The ego buils itself up similar to how an onion grows: layer after layer are added, the so called character is formed. We function more or less, but the true I is left behind, and others become a gague for our thinking and acting. We automatically become fitted into patterns of behavior: adapted and standardized. Life is a prison because the ego prevents us from living naturally and relaxed.
It is a dangerous dance on the razor’s edge, because in our attempt to do everythig right we often take on characteristics and roles that don’t fit us. We have to accept that we are not as others expect us to be and also not the way we want ourselves to be! How we would like to be is an illusion – it is only a mirroring of the expectations of others. We are great actors: we are playing the role of our lifetimes.
The ego can not exist in the present, only in the past and future. The past is no more, the future isn’t here yet. Both don’t exist. The ego can only exist itself in what doesn’t exist because it itself really doesn’t exist. In the pure moment of the present the ego isn’t there – only still, only nothingness, only conciousness.
Ego is a matter from the head, thinking keeps it alive and nourishes it. The less we are in our heads, the more we are in our bodies – in them is also no ego. We can outwit the ego by directing our attention toward our bodies. Out of the head, into the body. There are helpful tools to this end, i.e. meditation, yoga, and sex.Tantra says: throw the ego away, pull aside the veil, so you can find out who you really are. Buddha compares the ego to an onion that must be peeled. Remove the layers one by one until the last – then there is nothing left but the formerly blocked true inside…
Exactly there lies the solution, but also the challenge of recognizing what belongs to the layers and what to the core. Do I think something is good because someone else thinks it is good, or am I the one who finds it good. Is this my own experience?Exactly in the moment when we lose our egos we recognize what our true self is… in this moment we are free, natural and conciouss! That’s why we have an onion to peel, and the sooner we begin the better.